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Monday, March 29, 2010

Remember Me

There seems to be some hate going around lately. I know if you are reading this blog, you have seen or heard of it at some point. Where is the hate based? “Remember Me”.

Why blog about this now? Well, I finally got my lazy self back on Facebook and commented about seeing the movie and that I liked it. I also said that if you didn’t share my opinion, not to comment. My FB friends are like that – they say things to get my Irish up. Well, one did.

She posted, “…, it was completely unnecessary to put that in the film, ... You already feel compassion for everyone in the film, so using that as a means to create empathy is redundant and specifically using 9/11 is even more devastating. While I appreciate trying to incorporate something of that magnitude and tragedy into the film, I feel like it didn't need it.”

This comment is from one of my closest friends. I value her opinion and am actually grateful she commented on my wall.

Why? Well, simple really. For two weeks, I have been trying to wrap my head around just what it was about the hate directed at this movie that bothered me. When she posted her comment, she made my entire thought so clear that I didn’t wait to have Word open – I wrote in on my “wall”. Once I posted it, I knew this topic was the blog for The Faithful Shipper. I had planned a nice blog about appreciating the writers and readers in the fandom, or one about what is plagiarism. Instead, this one seemed more important to post – at least right now.

If you are reading this blog, chances are you are and RPattz fan. Whether you liked the movie or not, you support him. And that is fantastic! I completely understand if you didn’t like the movie. It’s your god-given right to have your own though, opinion, and reaction to something.

That being said, this is mine:

It is said that the use of 9/11 as a “character”, as the catalyst for “Remember Me” was inappropriate, that it wrongly fed on people’s emotions. That it was a cheap shot, that it took the honor away from those that died on that horrible day.

Really?

Because there have been movies about the WTC and the airlines and people didn’t have the same reaction to those. In fact, they were praised for being daring.
Why is that? Does it not all still center around the fact that innocent people lost their lives that day? That people were just going about, doing their version or normal, when life as they knew it stopped. Not just slowed down, it slammed to a halt that left us all with whiplash.

It wasn’t a fun day – it was horrific. I challenge anyone to remember what they were wearing that day or what the weather was anywhere but NYC, DC, and PA. BUT- we all can remember where we were when we heard the frightening news. We can all recall how blue the skies of New York City were, and how smoke filled the skies were in the aftermath along the Mid-Atlantic region.

And while all of that is so clear to us, the personal loss that people suffered isn’t. And that is the last crime to befall us post 9/11. We have all heard stories on the news and seen interviews with the survivors of that day and with the loved ones of those lost. But as is often the case with the news or interviews – they fall short of really bringing us into their pain, to feel all that they lost and what the lose meant, and still means to them. We didn’t know them as friends, as husbands, wives, sister, brothers, or parents. We know them as a footnote to history. But to their loved ones, they are loved, cherished, and missed.

Is that what bothers people about “Remember Me”? That we know someone’s back-story? Was it easier for us to look upon those killed that day as just a name read at the anniversary bell ringing ceremony? I believe in my soul that the pain never goes away for their loved ones and even hearing their name read is like reliving that day all over again.

There has to be a reason that people just don’t like this movie, but can watch anything else regarding that day. So what is it? Some have said it made light of the way the character died. Some have said it has used the events of 9/11 to create more empathy for the characters than what we were already feeling. It has also been said that it was just “cheap” to use 9/11 at all.

So if the lead character died in a car accident, would that have been better? Would that have made the movie more legit? This is the very topic that upsets me. I frankly think people cannot handle the subject matter and are using 9/11 as their excuse.

There have been movies at WTC's and United, so because this was not about the "hero's" of that day, does that somehow make it a mockery? Does it lessen the lose felt by a husband to know that his wife died just because she went to work? That a father would never hold his newborn baby because all he did was ride an elevator to provide a life for his pregnant wife?

This movie is a look into how life is constantly changing and how one small action or thought can change everything. It uses 9/11 as a backdrop, not to create empathy. In the end, we are not supposed to feel the horrors of 9/11 all over again (as some movies want us to). Instead, it wants us to feel for the characters and to see that one person can make a small difference. Isn't there a Chinese proverb about a single ripple on the water’s surface? Something like a rock will cause more ripples than a single pebble? Well, this movie is a single pebble. Movies like WTC and the UA movie are the rocks and "Remember Me" is the pebble. But the sad thing is that people are feeling they can attack this movie even if they haven't seen it.

Does that rest in the actors cast? It might. But if someone is shallow enough to hate on a brilliant movie simply for its cast, then the ultimate point of the movie is lost even more.

“Remember Me” is a haunting movie about love and loss. It reminds us all to stand up for what we believe in even if that means fighting that which scares us the most. It reminds us that our time here is all too limited. That one person change can change the world around them – even if it is limited to just their small corner of existence. It is a movie that ultimately is about coming to terms, understanding, and acceptance.

While I remember how the movie ended, what has stayed with me was the troubles of this young man and his sister, their deep and unwavering love for each other, the special bond they shared, the distance their father held with them, the lingering loss of a brother, and how hard it is to give your heart to someone when you have lost someone you loved. It wasn’t about planes or terrorists. It was about life and fragile and fleeting it truly can be.

Life isn’t perfect. It isn’t clean, it isn’t neat, and it doesn’t always have a happy ending. It’s real and raw. And maybe that is why people have rejected this movie – because it’s too real, too raw, too messy.

Ultimately, the movie is a like a George Seurat painting. It took many individual points to make one picture. I think that is what “Remember Me” was trying for. Taking the lives of hundreds lost that day and trying to remind us of the big picture – that someone lost someone very dear to them. All we have left once our loved ones depart us is to “Remember Me”.